I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
