Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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