I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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