Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
