In the future we'll all be gay
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You are the jesus of drinking
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
