I feel like I'm in dance class right now
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
