fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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