I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
