Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
