awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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