It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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