Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
no you cant smoke seaweed
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
