i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
