he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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