We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
