Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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