Me too!
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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