Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
