Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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