You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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