i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
