a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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