big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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