Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
