Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize