He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
