So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
