I wanna passion pit in your ass
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
