Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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