Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
