come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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