ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You were trust falling into bushes
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize
