Cold hands, warm shart.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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