Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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