Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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