She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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