she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
