Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
