After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
