i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize