It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
