yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Just cropdusted the office
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
