Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
True strength comes from lack of pants
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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