I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
