Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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