Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
