Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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