So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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