we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
