Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
